Hey Pain4Gainers,

Wanted to take the time and talk about an important subject that we all can relate too.  How to deal with Passive Aggressive Bullies (PAB) in your workplace or in your personal lives.

There are some people in this world, that we will come across and not have the most pleasant experience with.  Passive Aggressive Bullies (PAB) will be by far (in my experience) the most frustrating individuals to deal with.


People who are passive-aggressive, unfortunately, have very poor communication skills. You are probably thinking, what is a Passive Aggressive Bully (PAB)?  This is a person who does not express how they feel when they are upset or disappointed in a person or situation.  As a result, they use other means in showing their emotions or communications.  For example, saying negative comments towards you, no eye contact when speaking to you, leaving you notes or sending you emails to avoid confrontation and even short and rude verbal abuse from them.  Why do they do this, I don’t know why?!  I can only come up with a few ideas.

They are insecure in themselves

They do not feel confident around people who intimidate them

They just do not know how to express what’s on their mind

Whichever the case may be, at the end of the day, it is frustrating as hell to deal with PAB’s. 

It is frustrating because you do not get any feedback from PAB’s that you are doing a good or bad job.  The only feedback (if that is what you want to call it) is them being negative towards you and making your life miserable.  What sucks about this, the victim (you or someone you know) feels stuck, helpless, mentally and emotionally exhausted due to dealing with a PAB.


So, how do we deal with PAB’s?  How do we avoid the mental and emotional stress that they put on our lives?  Simple, you call them out on it and see what happens!


Will it be easy? NO!

Will it be uncomfortable? YES!

Will it be worth it? Absolutely!!

Passive aggressive people do not like to be called out. So,  I will give you one simple solution:  Call them out on their bluff.


Here is a clip of Mike Tyson calling out a host where the host took a cheap shot to IRON MIKE.

The point to this video is, what are people going to do when you call them out on their passive aggressiveness?  99% of the time, nothing!!


PAB’s do not like to be confronted!  This is why they are passive aggressive in the first place.  The only time the PAB’S talk about an issue, is when the other person brings it up.  Only then, they are forced to talk about it.  Most likely, they will pretend that nothing is wrong and chances are, they will be on their best behavior in front of you.


So, how do we communicate to PAB  that are making our lives a living nightmare?  Easy, you talk to them like an adult.  The next time you see them, ask if you can have a moment of their time.  Make sure you take the time to say EVERYTHING that you need to say and get it off your chest.  If not, you will have regrets for not expressing how you truly feel.    Here are some examples that I have used in the past with some of my formal PAB’s:


  • I noticed that you and I are having some friction, is there something that I did or I am doing right now, that is bothering you?
  • Hey (NAME), I noticed that you have been addressing me in an aggressive tone lately; and even a little disrespectful at times. Is there something I did or I am doing right now that is bothering you?
  • Lately, I have noticed that you have been talking to me in this manner and honestly, I take it offensively.  Is there something you would like to discuss with me.


If you notice, no matter how you put it, you have to be DIRECT and UPFRONT with people you are having problems with.  PAB’s are not used to face to face confrontation and chances are, in this scenario, you have the emotional edge for bringing up the issue.    You will be the Alpha in the room and in control.


I hope this helps and do not let Passive Aggressive Bullies take control of your emotions.  We can stop the abuse by being honest and upfront with them.


Take care.




  1. Very good written article. It will be helpful to anyone who employess it, as well as me. Keep up the good work – i will definitely read more posts.

  2. My brother recommended I might like this blog. He was totally right. This post truly made my day. You can not imagine just how much time I had spent for this information! Thanks!

    1. thank you!! I am on a few sighted and non sighted communities. Many people put their disablities as their sole reasons for feeling bad. My job here, is to express those feeling and figure out why I am feeling this way

  3. What i do not understood is actually how you’re now not really a lot more well-preferred than you might be right now. You are so intelligent. You realize therefore significantly in relation to this topic, made me for my part consider it from numerous numerous angles. Its like women and men aren’t fascinated unless it is one thing to do with Woman gaga! Your personal stuffs outstanding. At all times take care of it up!

  4. May I just say what a comfort to discover somebody who
    genuinely understands what they’re talking about on the net.
    You certainly realize how to bring an issue to light and make it important.
    A lot more people must check this out and understand this side of your
    story. It’s surprising you’re not more popular because you certainly possess the

  5. hi!,I like your writing very so much! share we communicate extra about your post on AOL? I require a specialist on this area to unravel my problem. May be that’s you! Having a look ahead to see you.

  6. What’s Going down i am new to this, I stumbled upon this I’ve discovered It positively useful and it has aided me out loads. I hope to contribute & help different customers like its helped me. Great job.

  7. I simply want to tell you that I’m new to blogging and site-building and truly enjoyed your blog. Probably I’m going to bookmark your blog . You certainly come with beneficial articles and reviews. Bless you for revealing your web-site.

  8. What’s up i am kavin, its my first time to commenting anywhere, when i read this paragraph i thought i could also make comment due to this sensible post.

  9. Pretty great post. I simply discovered your weblog and wished to bring up that I’ve really
    loved surfing around your blog posts. Regardless I’ll be subscribing within your feed and I am hoping you write once
    again soon!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *